August 2010
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“Someone has said that it requires less mental effort to condemn than to think.”
– Emma Goldman, Anarchism: What It Really Stands For (1910) (via blogut) (via fuckyeahemmagoldman)
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Strippers, tired of the members of a nearby... →
fuck yeah
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How do you become an old punk?
What do you accept? What do you fight? You fought everything before, but now…You have to fit in, sort of. It seems a bit much to be pissed off and angry and violent in your 30s. Or does it? Maybe it’s perfect? Clearly, though, you can’t go around getting arrested every month. What about every 6 months to a year? That’s where you’re at now. Still, it sucks balls. What...
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I'm gonna get drunk and piss, like, everywhere.
On the the green. On the golfcart. On my friend’s clubs. I’m gonna piss in those little holes where the balls go. They’ll yell at me: “Hey! Only little white balls go in those holes!” And I’m gonna say: “Fuck you! Piss goes in them as well!” And then I’ll fucking smack him upside the head with my big iron club. I like a sport that provides me...
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Tomorrow. Me. Golfing.
Damn.
Never have I golfed. Never have I wanted to. Rather, I mocked it, correctly. Hitting a little tiny ball all around a vast, zillion-dollar yard: it seemed like the behavior of those who should be at least sterilized, if not killed. Rich people beating off in a really complex way, but beating off nonetheless.
I will do it, though.
Lisa says I should experience everything.
Even this.
Damn.
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I was talking to a girl today, someone I'm...
and she began a sentence this way: “The guy I’m currently banging…”
How cool is that?
Hahaha. She cracks me up.
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Write one leaf about dust.
(via writeoneleaf)
It was a fine Fall morning when I left for the mall, credit card in hand. The air was as crisp as burnt toast and the radiation was on Low. As I drove, I was secure in my intentions: to appease for a time the hungry naught of my soul with a little madcap consumerism. I thought of things I didn’t need, licked my chops, and stomped even harder on the gas. Shorty after I...
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dicks-oak:
early-onset-of-night replied to your post: stfuracists replied to your link: Please reblog…
What’s wrong with a gay-straight alliance anyway? I know you guys aren’t one, but still….Anyway, I signed and reblogged. Not sure how much value it will have since I don’t go to your school, but always support this stuff :)
Well we originally (almost two years ago) had appealed for a GSA and...
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It's funny that pirates were always going around...
never realizing that the real treasure was the fond memories they were creating.
The face of a child can say it all,
especially the mouth part of the face.
“Life without sex might be safer but it would be unbearably dull. It is the sex...”
– Henry Louis Mencken (via art-or-porn) (via woahitsalyssa)
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I know we all Tumble, but who here Stumbles?
That is, uses StumbleUpon? If you do, would you do me a solid?
Recommend my writing to other Stumblers by clicking here
Only if you actually like my writing, of course :)
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littlekitten-deactivated2010120 asked: i laughed so hard when i saw that uranus looks like someone literally drew a circle in paint and selected a vague turquoise to fill it with
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You may or may not know, but I like to drink.
It’s my drug of choice. I occasionally smoke some pot, too, but drinking is funner to me. However, alcohol is a powerful, dangerous drug and I try to moderate it. If I have a 6-pack, it should take me 6 hours to drink it. I get a little silly. I get a little happy, but I don’t get stupid. Or sick. Or hungover. I get buzzed and feel perfectly fine in the morning. Perhaps a tad tired, but generally...
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The most isolated man on the planet:
oldsmokey:
The most isolated man on the planet will spend tonight inside a leafy palm-thatch hut in the Brazilian Amazon. As always, insects will darn the air. Spider monkeys will patrol the treetops. Wild pigs will root in the undergrowth. And the man will remain a quietly anonymous fixture of the landscape, camouflaged to the point of near invisibility.
Read more.
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First Interstate Bank on North Avenue Between...
So I was in line, slowly dying because everything was taking forever. I hate lines. I looked around for something to focus on, but it was a bank and that meant blank. It was boring solidified, boring made three dimensional. They say Jesus was the incarnation of god. I have serious doubts about that, but I know for a fact that banks are the incarnation of boring. Over to the left was the...
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Exposing yourself. This I don't get. But thanks. I...
The way it seems to me, people are sending their cocks and love tacos all over the internet all the time. I can’t imagine ever doing it. I can’t imagine a scenario where I would put together a series of activities the end result of which is a digital representation of my meat hammer in an inbox, pun intended.
I was with someone for years and wouldn’t even send her a cock...
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Anonymous asked: There are people who think Margarine is food??
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Tomato Soup From Hell
by me! First chop up some tomatos, real ones, not canned ones—skin, seeds and all (except for the green or gray part on the top). You’ll want 4 cups, so about 4 regular-sized tomatos should do it. Put this mess in a bowl, liquid and all, and set aside. Make two cups of chicken broth. I use organic chicken base, one teaspoon to one cup boiling water. Dice up 3 or 4 cloves of garlic and...
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And so I sit her in the corner, and sometimes...
And when I’m feeling naughty, I blow her up with air.
allthesaintswereschizophrenic replied to your post: I was trying to say this in a reblog, but, amazingly, tumblr screwed it up. TUMBLR! Can you believe it?
sounds very dictator-like.
Yep. Like the original essay, it was sarcasm and satire, which was the ‘unit’ we were studying at the time in English, and also why the instructor had us read A Modest Proposal.
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I was trying to say this in a reblog, but,...
Yeah…we had to write our own Modest Proposal, too, in English class. I proposed we give everyone an IQ test and then sterilize everyone over 100, except a select few, who then would be given control of the government and corporations. I felt it would make their dominance and exploitation much easier.
A Modest Proposal →
outlineofadeer:
early-onset-of-night:
bigwordsexciteme:
This is one of my all-time favorite essays.
Mine too. Go read it!
fuck yeah. we had to write our own modest proposals in AP English in high school after we read this. i proposed we send all the gay people to their own island. my teacher thought it was awesome. she said it was an extra kick in the ass because i’m gay.
Ha,...
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A Modest Proposal →
bigwordsexciteme:
This is one of my all-time favorite essays.
Mine too. Go read it!
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Do email spammers experience any kind of success...
They must or they wouldn’t do it, but I don’t see how. Their messages are barely readable, in some sort of internet pidgin English or are so garbled and twisted so as to get around filters you can’t even read it.
But someone out there, some lamebrain is actually clicking on their links and bringing them “success”. Right?
Here is a subject from an email I got this...
thefrozencreek replied to your post: shitstroll replied to your post: Something I’ve…
I agree with shitstroll so much. I hate when people do it and they do it ALL. THE TIME. maybe I really am weird.
Well, wtf does ‘weird’ mean? Unusual? Odd?
There’s a judgment in it, I think. When someone calls you weird, they’re saying you’re different, but not in a good...
shitstroll replied to your post: Something I’ve noticed about getting old.
It’s always struck me wrong when someone calls me weird. Even if they mean it in a harmless, silly way it really bothers me. Dunno why it does so much. It’s nearly the only way to offend me.
It’s because it minimizes you. It puts you into a category. It defines you….and it’s fucking bullshit.
...
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Something I've noticed about getting old.
And I’m not getting older. People who are getting older are actually getting old and lying about it.
I don’t like being discounted or minimized.
Like, someone will call me weird. I used to actually dig this when younger. Now it pisses me off.
I’m like I’m weird? Fuck you.
When someone calls you ‘weird’ they got a box all picked out for you to fit in.
Fuck...
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Can Feminism Liberate Men? : Ms Magazine Blog →
daisies-and-vervain:
This is the flipside of patriarchical advantage: Buy into the whole enterprise and you’ll spend your entire life trying and failing to become a Real Man. That’s enough to put anyone in therapy, if therapy weren’t for pussies.
I submit that all American men have had to, at some point in their lives, deal with the insecurity that comes from failing to be a Real Man. The...
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Bad dates
I’m old so I been thru some shit. Listen.
The only way you can have a bad date is if you are not truly sexually attracted to someone. If you are, then you can and WILL forgive about just everything.
“He picks and eats his buggers….but he’s SO hot.” Works the same way for guys.
“She’s so stupid she couldn’t figure out how to get out of the...
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The Great Bear Country Riot of 2010, part zwei
part ein
This story is of the Great Bear Country Riot of 2010. You’ve never heard of it, I know. Riots are unseemly and if you live here in the Black Hills and read the papers, you know that nothing unseemly is ever printed in them because it’s bad publicity for the area, and this area is all about tourism. Everything is always hunky-dory, locally. The economy might be in the pisser, but...
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Every once in a while, I do check the news.
Something about them wanting to build a mosque at Ground Zero. Big controversy about it.
Blah, blah. Who gives a shit? Why is this even an issue? You think those fucking lunatics who flew the planes into the World Trade Center were Islamic? Gimme a break. If they were religious in anyway, which I don’t think they were, it was Satanic, not Islamic.
Bin Laden follows the teachings of the...
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The Great Bear Country Riot of 2010, part ein
If you’ve never heard of Sturgis, I can’t help you. Put this story down, go home, and paint your house beige because you’re boring as all hell. I will assume that you have an inkling about Sturgis. It may be a big assumption, but you people have to give me something to work with, otherwise I can’t write this story and we’re just wasting each other’s time. Every writer must make assumptions....
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I received quite a few yes's on my question and...
Seriously. I’m not a dick or a masculine asshole or none of that shit.
But.
I don’t know what to do NOW. I mean, I’ve flirted and charmed her, I made her laugh, I got her to go out with me, we drank, we hung out, I put my arm around her, I kissed her, I kissed her neck and chest, I ate her pussy and fucked the hell out of her.
This is what I wanted to do with her. I DO NOT...
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Honestly
I don’t understand how someone can NOT eat pussy. I have a friend who eats his woman’s pussy like he has to. He rolls his eyes, shrugs, sighs, and then bends down into the shit.
WTF? I say.
How can you NOT eat pussy? How can you not enjoy it? Whenever I have access to a woman’s pussy, that’s GOOD!
GOOD!
Always: pussy=good. There have been times in my life where there...
