August 2012
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Journalist: "Congressman Kucinich, I believe you're the only one here who voted against the PATRIOT act right away after 9/11. Why is that?"
Dennis Kucinich: "Because I read it."
What's the difference between a cow and 9/11?
botulizard:
You can’t milk a cow for 11 years straight.
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It's all stupid and not worth discussing.
In my favorite book, Catch 22, there is a scene where the main character Yossarian is talking to someone who believes passionately in something. And he didn’t pay attention at all to what it was, just the passion. He was amazed at how passionate this person was about…whatever. And he concluded, correctly, that the person was insane. If you remove the subjects and verbs from a...
damonwells replied to your post: So do you believe in intelligent design?
weeee
Indeed. Design is also human. We’re talking about the god of the universe, not fucking engineers.
Anonymous asked: So do you believe in intelligent design?
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Just got home from a street festival.
Sort of an end of summer bash. Thousands of people were there, many of them not even on Social Security. Beer was 4 bucks for a 16 ouncer. Not too shabby. I got my pink “MAKE RESPONSIBLE DECISIONS” wristband and entered the plastic gates. I knew no one. Everywhere I looked were strangers, some of them with hair not even gray. My son’s band, The Wax Bananas, won a summer-long...
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Just diced up some jalapenos, then rubbed my eye.
Thank god I didn’t masturbate!
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MEAGER FOOD FOR SOULS FORGOT.
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Gloria ~ The Doors. I dedicate this to every woman...
Next, I'm getting a "Fuck Me" cane and a "Fuck Me"...
:)
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I used to live here years ago.
In this town, I mean. Long before I had a kid or any hope or prospects or a point, I lived here—out by the Air Force base. That’s kind of a shitty part of town, lots of trailer houses and freeways and strip malls. I had three female roommates, Darcy, Alisha, and Tammy. I wonder what those gals are up to these days? I don’t even recall their last names. It’s a beautiful...
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Trying to explain to my friend how you can't get a...
I’m giving fashion advice at 5 o’clock in the morning via text to a drunk guy in Northern California. He’s got his eye on this $65 pair of Sketcher boots. I told him to reach inside and feel the toe. If there’s what feels like a plastic shell over the toe BANG! it’s a piece of shit boot. It’s common sense, I thought. Yep, that plastic shell will collapse in...
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God is talking to you, Republicans
GOP cancels first day of convention over hurricane concerns
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Five foods for Friday
1. Fried jasmine rice, with minced onions and garlic, sliced hot peppers, chunks of pineapple, tossed in tamari. I eat this three, sometimes four times a week. Note: My body is largely constructed out of jasmine rice. I smell delightful when I sweat. 2. Shredded iceberg lettuce tossed with thinly sliced onions and various other yummy stuff. Smothered in my personal vinaigrette, Angel Jizz. Note:...
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Summa Scientia Nihil Scire
“The height of knowledge is to know nothing.” —Christian Rosenkreutz, from The Chymical Wedding, circa early 1600s
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Tonight's Supper will be,
say it with me, Blumenkohlsuppe. Or Creamy Cauliflower Soup. German-style, obviously. I’ve never made it and will be resisting stuffing a bunch of cheese into it. Some altered recipes out there have a goodly amount of cheese in them. I love cauliflower, though, and want to try the traditional German recipe. Cheese makes EVERYTHING taste better, it’s true. You can melt cheese over a dog...
exportswede:
Early Onset of Night: Julian Assange
early-onset-of-night:
He said he’d go to Sweden to face trial and clear his name if Swedish authorities don’t extradite him to the US. They will, though, so he isn’t going. He also said he’d submit to Swedish questioning on UK soil, but Sweden refused. I don’t know if he’s a rapist or not. Perhaps Sweden should…
The man has a point,...
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Julian Assange
He said he’d go to Sweden to face trial and clear his name if Swedish authorities don’t extradite him to the US. They will, though, so he isn’t going. He also said he’d submit to Swedish questioning on UK soil, but Sweden refused. I don’t know if he’s a rapist or not. Perhaps Sweden should promise not to send him to the US so we can all find out and punish his...
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So they were wrong. Akin is staying in.
Can I get an amen? Since the Republicans withdrew all their money from him, I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that he’s secretly being funded by Democrats. Akin is now a symbol of everything that’s wrong with the Republican Party. Let’s keep talking about him! With the addition of banning all abortions, even in cases of rape, to the Republican Party platform, you’ve...
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Wheelchairs
So my mother’s memorial was at the VFW down in our old hometown. It was great seeing everyone. Never before have I been given so many hugs. Seriously, my hugging muscles are sore. There is a bar in the VFW and that’s where we all ended up, drinking. My mom did not want a funeral, she wanted a going away party. I had fun, though I called it a night around 10:30 pm. I’m old...
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Mormons were here.
They were riding bikes, had little backpacks, white shirts, boring ties, black slacks.
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County commission to study problem-causing drain →
There is nothing worse than a problem-causing drain. They are simple things, drains. We do not ask them for much—except to not cause any problems. Generally, we humans never think about our drains. Normally, our thoughts are entirely drain-free. But when a formerly well-behaved drain suddenly turns into a problem-causing drain, why, it needs to be studied. “How come,” we wonder,...
justmycommentary asked: I think I missed the last installment of what happened with your son and the party and your hat. I scrolled through a few pages trying to find it but got distracted. Think you could send me the link to it? I'm dying to know what happened.
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So today I played croquet
on uneven ground in a park-like setting. I won two out of three games, British rules, but only because I knew how to hold the mallet, how to aim. The girl, she didn’t. I tried to help her, tried to show how straight her one arm is supposed to be, but she blew it off, laughing. “Look,” she said. “I’m playing croquet. Who plays croquet?” “Ok,” I said,...
“They couldn’t call her black spice, or ethnic spice. Ethnicity scares us, we’re...”
– Summet (via trapped-n-da-closet-with-malcolm)
“Some of it’s magic, some of it’s tragic, but I’ve had a good...”
– Jimmy Buffett
I swear tumblr is somehow randomly making me...
generalbriefing:
Stop it tumblr!
This is a fact. I’ve noticed it, too. It goes both ways as well, with Tumblr having some of your followers “unfollow” you. I’ve been tracking it, even, and have pretty much come to the conclusion that my follower count has been fixed. If I get two new followers today, two others will unfollow me tomorrow. If ten people follow me, ten...
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Ray
Fewer sights are stranger than a 40-year old man riding a 10-speed bike and smoking a cigarette, but that’s what I get to see every morning at 5 o’clock when I come to work. They say he’s a big drunk, but he seems nice enough to me when he comes in for his Marlboros or his 84-ounce Big Gulp. He goes by Ray and he’s got a slew of DWIs behind him, thus the ridiculous 10-speed. He works across...
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Report on tv watching
I know you are all on the edge of your seats wondering how my day of tv watching was going, so I thought I would file this little report. Shortly after I was done in the kitchen, I removed my pants and began some hardcore, balls-to-the-wall laying around. On the couch at first, then later on the floor, which I find more comfortable usually. I watched several episodes of Infested! which freaked me...
lonelyinsomniac replied to your post: Hummus
It’s always a good day when you shit in a toilet instead of a bag!
I want this on a t-shirt :)
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Hummus
Gonna make a big ol’ batch of it and eat on cracked wheat toast with heirloom tomatoes. Today I have designated TV DAY, so I’m downloading Infested! from Animal Planet, which chronicles the invasion of bugs and snakes and spiders into peoples homes. Also, the new Project Runway. Some Hoaders. Hoaders is a show where I just stare slack-jawed at the screen going “Holy fuck!”...
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