So tonight I thought, “Wouldn’t it be ridiculous if I went to Bingo?” and did.
Actually, that’s not true. I thought on Wednesday, “Wouldn’t it be ridiculous if I went to bingo Friday night?” and so just got back.
I knew absolutely nothing about Bingo. For one, I didn’t realize it was a form of gambling. People were winning $90, $75, $25…It was nuts. (I won jack shit). I didn’t know how to play and learned by doing. I bought a green sponge marker, a packet of cards, a pitcher of beer, and a cardboard tray of cardboard French fries, all for around thirty-five bucks.
I had to watch other people to figure out what was going on, plus there was a big display up on the wall with numbers and flashing lights that told you vaguely what was going on.
You know, the standard bingo game where you try to make a straight line up and down or back and forth or diagonally we only played once? Each game was different, a different shape you had to get, to win. On one, you made an X. On another, a 6-pack. Still another was a kite. There was the Crazy Cross, where you tried to get various permutations of a cross. That was the most holy one, and as I played it, I thanked Almighty God Himself for allowing me to live long enough to play bingo bemusedly with a bunch of geriatrics.
It was at The Retired Enlisted Association building and the whole time I was there I could feel the simmering rivalry with the VFW. “Everybody knows about the VFW,” their sad eyes told me, “but TREA? Yeah, we’re all but forgotten.”
I imagined war breaking out between the VFW and TREA and laughed. Then I imagined the Rotary Club brokering the peace between them and laughed harder.
It was a good time. I enjoyed myself. I’m gonna go every Friday night.
Why not? What else is there to do?
Which, by the way, they don’t put in a garbage can but on the ground in front of their house.
Walking my dogs passed there yesterday, I came across eight or ten empty Primatene packets, plus an equal number of empty car air freshener packets—you know, the trees you hang from your rearview mirror. This was all scattered around their small yard. I also spied one empty packet of condoms.
LOL. I’d never fuck anyone who scattered empty Primatene and air freshener packets around their yard.
Who the hell are these people?
his life was totally in danger.
True story; this officer (John Pike) got a settlement of $38,000 because he said he got depressed after pepper spraying these kids. Oh, the depression wasn’t for feeling remorseful for pepper spraying a bunch of college kids peacefully protesting. He got depressed because he said since the media kept playing the video of him pepper spraying peaceful kids without cause, he got threats and didn’t feel safe. He didn’t feel safe. I’m not making that up. This motherfucker collected nearly 40 grand on worker’s comp after assaulting a bunch of college kids.
What a piece of shit this guy is. Wow.
But I am just an observer half a world away. Imagine: a significant world event in which nobody dies. We have, like, one of those a century.
What would the Union Jack look like, I wonder?
Oh, and Obama and Bill Clinton and the UK government are all against Scottish independence. That should tell you right there it’s a good idea.
She’s so swishy in her satin and tat
In her frock coat, and bipperty-bopperty hat
Oh God, I could do better than that!
Reinstate Pete Rose! (Pretend he only beat up his wife or toddler or tortured dogs or something).
You have that whole Ray Rice wife-beating monster case, where he was given a slap on the wrist…until everybody got outraged that he was only given a slap on the wrist. A bunch of lies were then told to cover up the obvious bullshit reversal.
Now you got this Adrian Peterson ass who beats toddlers with wooden sticks. Just three days ago, the Vikings said he’d be allowed to play and practice while his child abuse case oozed its way through court…until everybody got outraged, and they were all, suddenly, “After giving the situation additional thought…”
Only a freshly Windexed pane of glass is more transparent than these NFL dipshits.
What is a country? A country is a piece of land surrounded on all sides by boundaries, usually unnatural. Englishmen are dying for England, Americans are dying for America, Germans are dying for Germany, Russians are dying for Russia. There are now fifty or sixty countries fighting in this war. Surely so many countries can’t all be worth dying for. — Joseph Heller, Catch-22
I can’t say enough nice things about this hole.
Popularity is the hallmark of mediocrity. — Niles Crane
Good morning. We had the earliest snowfall since 1888. A new record, but by only two days, so not really that amazing
I predict another long, cold winter. Yay! I love winter :)
Internet equality, meaning, especially,the principle that Internet service providers should enable access to all content and applications regardless of the source, and without favoring or blocking particular products or websites.
section9 said about I DID IT!: Who is your senator?
Tim Johnson, a Democrat, and John Thune, a Republican. I was connected by Tumblr to Johnson’s office…
sitsafe said regarding I DID IT!: What did you tell them?
Tumblr actually provides some handy talking points in case you get nervous or tongue-tied—not to mention the fact they actually make the call for you. I scanned those talking points, but, as you can imagine, I had my own.
It was only like a 45 second conversation. I just told him that I strongly supported net neutrality and that I thought fast and slow lanes were a horrible, discriminatory idea.
He thanked me, took my name and address, and that was it.
GET THOSE PHONES RINGING.