— Mr. Spock
What I do on the internet is go somewhere without leaving. I’m still at home, but I’m gone. I’m in Tumblr land being a smartass. I’m in torrent land stealing music and movies or whole seasons of commercial free television. In June of 2008, I eliminated television as a source of entertainment and it was a good decision. This makes the internet the only source of plugged-in entertainment in my life. It’s a good thing, too, because you can find ANYTHING on the internet. Shit porn? Check. Comedy, acquaintances, and slo-mo sex with farm animals? Check. Passionate pointless political discussion? Check. Nude midgets covered in olive oil and rolling around in spaghetti sauce? Probably (remind me to google later).
Since the internet provides everything television provides and more, television is irrelevant. It’s the horse-drawn carriage of entertainment.
The internet is active, television is passive. You hunt and seek on the net, while on television you are provided a list of channels with a list of programs. I remember the day I got rid of tv. It was June 10, 2008. I was sitting on my couch flipping through the channels. There was nothing, absolutely nothing I really wanted to watch. I had like 140 channels too—140 channels of pure shit.
Then it hit me: “I’m fucking PAYING for this?”
Not anymore, mister. I may be an American, but I don’t HAVE to be dumb as a fucking rock, too.
I would rather “do” on the “internet” than “look” at the “tv”.
— Wendy. 8 years old. (via nikiwithissues)
I like fucking around in your formsprings and ask pages. Anonymously. I’m usually really ridiculous. If somebody says something really stupid or corny or bizarre, rest assured, it’s me. Often I will be sexual, but in a really dorky way. I’m bored. I’m just having fun. I don’t really want to fuck. I mean, most of you are really cute. I mean, I’m intelligent and older and can spot beauty much easier than some awkward goofball 19 year old with his air all swept to one side. I’ll say things like: “What say me and you bang, sweetums?” Most of the time she gets it. I’m not actually trying to bang her. I’m just bored and messing around. I’m never going to meet any of you people irl. Not that I wouldn’t want to. The vast majority of you are pretty cool in my book. It’s just a logistical thing. Like I’m gonna make it over to London to hook up with that cute 20 year old nursing student. I might, however, suggest anonymously that she dress up like a clown and perform oral sex on me while Yanni plays softly in the background. See? I’m kidding around. One time, however, I suggested that me and this girl “do the horizontal bop”. Her reply was “Sorry. I’m engaged to Steve.”
Shot down again. Damn!